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When he was a kid, he didn't have toy cars or posters of lambos on his bedroom wall, he had toy tractors and trailers and posters of the latest John Deeres.
So one day, Bob was at the Zoo checking out the animals. While he was reading the sign on the Gorilla cage, he noticed some movement out of the corner oh his eye, and notice an Ape staring at him, and mimicking his movements.
The old lady depressed and wants to kill herself goes to the doctor and asks him "Where is the heart located?" The doctor tells her it is under the left breast. The old lady goes to the gun store and buys a gun, goes home and puts the gun under her left breast and pulls the trigger. The old lady was soon admitted to the hospital with a bullet wound to her left knee.
A six-year-old goes to the hospital with her mother to visit her Grandpa. When they get to the hospital, she runs ahead of her mother and bursts into her Grandpa's room. "Grandpa, Grandpa," she says excitedly, "as soon as my mother comes into the room, make a noise like a frog!"
Honey, I got hit by a car outside of the office. Tina brought me to the hospital. They have been taking tests and doing x-rays. The blow to my head is very strong, may be serious. Also, I have 3 broken ribs, a broken arm, a compound fracture on my left leg and they may have to amputate the right foot.
She was told that the most effective way would be to shoot herself through the heart, just below her left breast... She woke up in hospital with a gunshot wound to her knee.
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You can explore hospital patient reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean hospital illness dad jokes. There are also hospital puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
Nurses are amazing people. They work long hours in stressful environments and (sometimes) deal with cranky patients—all while delivering loving care with a smile to their patients. Their days are as mentally and physically exhausting as they are rewarding. Yet ask any nurse why they do what they do and most will say it’s because they love to care for people. Having an extra funny bone helps nurses get through the day. Heck, being able to laugh in any situation lightens the day, whether they are funny dentist jokes in the waiting room, clever accounting jokes while you’re getting your taxes done, or witty work-from-home jokes you share on Zoom.
10. A patient arrived at the ER via an ambulance with minor burns on his legs. His shoes and the bottoms of his jeans are charred. The doctor asks what happened, and the patient says he was trying to use a propane-powered weed burner in his yard, and things go out of hand. The doctor noted his breath reeked of alcohol and asked him if he had been drinking. The patient adamantly says no. The doctor couldn’t resist a setup like this and looked the man directly in the eye and said, “liar, liar, pants on fire.” Everyone had a good laugh, except the patient, who was so drunk it went over his head.
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