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Patrick, who was vacationing in the Bahamas couldn't seem to make it with any of the girls. So he asked the local lifeguard for some advice. "Mate, it's obvious," says the lifeguard, "you're wearing them old baggy swimming trunks that make ya look like an old geezer. They're years outta style. Your best bet is to grab yourself a pair of Speedos - about two sizes too small - and drop a fist-sized potato down inside 'em. I'm tellin' ya man... you'll have all the babes ya want!"The following weekend, Patrick hits the beach with his spanking new tight Speedos, and his fist-sized potato. Everybody on the beach was disgusted as he walked by, covering their faces, turning away, laughing, looking sick! So he went back to the lifeguard again and asked him, "What's wrong now?" "Damn, Mate!" said the lifeguard, "The potato goes in front!!"
"Mate, it's obvious," says the lifeguard, "you're wearing them old baggy swimming trunks that make ya look like an old geezer. They're years outta style. Your best bet is to grab yourself a pair of Speedos - about two sizes too small - and drop a fist-sized potato down inside' em. I'm tellin' ya man... you'll have all the babes ya want!"
The following weekend, Patrick hits the beach with his spanking new tight Speedos, and his fist-sized potato. Everybody on the beach was disgusted as he walked by, covering their faces, turning away, laughing, looking sick!
a irishman went to a beach in Austarlia but he never seemed to make it with any girls so he decided to ask the local lifeguard for help." how do i get all the girls to be attracted to me"? asked the irishman."well" said the lifeguard." go and buy a pair of speedos 2 sizes to small and put a fist sized potato inside them. so the next day the irishman came back with his speedos and his potato. every body stared and laughed at him. so the irishman decided to ask the lifeguard why everyone was looking at him. whilst laughing the lifeguard said. " you are supposed to put the potato in the front not the back"!!!
Little Johnny is approached by the lifeguard at the public swimming pool."You're not allowed to pee in the pool," says the lifeguard. "I'm going to report you.""But everyone pees in the pool," whined Little Johnny."Maybe," answered the lifeguard, "but not from the diving board!"
“It’s perfectly natural,” the mother says, “for young children to urinate in the pool. Plenty of children at this pool do it. I don’t see why my son doing it is such a big deal.”
A Catholic priest is drowning in the Ocean. A lifeguard swims past and asks the priest: "Do you need help?" Priest replies: "Don't worry. God will save me." A few minutes go by and another life guard swims past. He says: "Here, grab my hand I can help you get back to shore" Priest rep...
All summer the young man would go to the neighborhood pool. In the mornings he would teach children of all ages pool safety and how to swim. In the afternoons he sat up in the big chair and watched swimmers.
A lifeguard with a huge masculine body and a very small head (I mean unnaturally small) was patrolling the beach. Many people knew himWhen his head was normally sized but everyone was too scared to ask him what had happened... until Tim walked past him and said “hold up! Bob what happened to you...
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